To properly understand this subject, it is essential to ask ourselves, “What is love?” Love is viewed differently by different people, but generally, love is a warm affection or liking, often accompanied by sexual passion. Man, by nature, is a being of attraction; males and females have this innate attraction towards each other. God has placed this within us, for without it, the law of procreation would not take effect. This attraction becomes noticeable during the teenage years, which is when one enters a period called puberty. Puberty is the stage in life when a person’s reproductive organs become functional, marking the beginning of emotional feelings for the opposite sex.
However, this is not the right time to fall in love. The consequences of falling in love at this stage are numerous and often severe. This is why it is crucial for parents to remain close to their children during this time and provide them with proper sex education. Additionally, it is important for parents to invest time in teaching their children the word of God. As the scriptures say, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). The word of God lays a foundation for good moral development in the life of a child, leading them towards maturity.
THE PLACE OF MATURITY
Maturity, in this context, means being fully grown or developed. This must be a total development, encompassing physical, emotional, and psychological maturity before one even considers falling in love with the opposite sex. With maturity comes the wisdom to handle life’s issues, including love. Maturity brings about balance in judgment and the possibility of making sound decisions. It’s important to remember that some people mature at an early age, while others do so later in life. Both are influenced by exposure to life’s experiences, which help to shape wisdom.
Now that we understand the concept of maturity in relationships, it’s important to recognize that falling in love does not give one the license to engage in illicit affairs. Instead, it helps in deciding who to marry. You should marry someone you genuinely love. It’s not necessary to fall in love with multiple people before marriage. Maturity guides you to study a person and gradually develop feelings based on their attributes. Falling in love takes time; it is nurtured by frequent communication and spending time together. Through this process, you discover qualities in the other person that ignite your love and passion, ultimately leading to a deep and meaningful relationship.
Maturity also equips you to make sound judgments. If you are a young person experiencing feelings for someone, it’s time to reflect. Confide in your parents for good advice. Save yourself from the consequences of premature decisions, such as unwanted pregnancies or abortions. There is nothing better than doing things at the right time, including falling in love. The feelings you have for the opposite sex as a young person are likely not love, but lust. Do what is right: end any friendship that is detrimental to your future. If you are in a relationship with someone you don’t truly love and are engaging in illicit activities, it’s crucial to reassess your actions. As a mature individual capable of making sound decisions, understand the importance of love in a relationship. A relationship built on sex or illicit behavior is not healthy. Your relationship should be rooted in love, with marriage as the ultimate goal.
FALLING IN LOVE
If you have fallen in love as a mature individual, it’s time to start working towards settling down. The temptation to engage in sexual relations with the person you love is real. However, the scriptures caution, “I want you to promise, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right” (Song of Songs 8:4). Awakening love here refers to engaging in sexual activities, which should only occur at the appropriate time—within the confines of marriage. As a mature individual, work towards marriage with the person you love before consummating the relationship.
The bottom line is that falling in love is for mature individuals.
Scripture References:
- Proverbs 22:6
- Song of Solomon 8:4
